New Elizabeth Ministry offers support to families

By Katherine Long
Sun associate editor

Patty D’Angelo was beyond thrilled when she found out she was pregnant in May of 2008. She and her husband, Vince, had been trying to conceive for about two years and the couple felt their prayers were finally being answered.

They were gleefully texting friends and family cell phone photos of their 19-week sonogram images when they were called back into the office: The technician saw something in the sonogram. There could be a problem with the baby.

A more detailed sonogram confirmed that Patty and Vince’s child had a congenital diaphragmatic hernia (CDH), a condition in which  the diaphragm— the muscle that separates the chest from the abdomen —doesn’t form properly or at all. The missing or malformed diaphragm allows the organs in the abdomen — intestines, liver, stomach — to move into the chest, which compresses the lungs and keeps them from developing fully. The condition occurs in about 1 out of every 2,500 babies and has a survival rate of around 50%.

Based on measurements taken from the sonogram, doctors gave Patty and Vince’s baby a 70 to 80% chance of survival. They were told it would not be an easy pregnancy and that their baby would need to be put on a respirator immediately after birth, followed as soon as feasible by surgery to correct the defect. An extended stay in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) should be expected.

“It was incredible,” Patty said. “We went from being at the happiest point in our lives to the lowest point imaginable.”

Working with a team of doctors and an enormous amount of prayer, Patty carried the baby to term without any serious complications and delivered Vincent Charles D’Angelo, called Charlie, in February of 2009. At just six days old, he underwent successful corrective surgery and after 85 days of fighting and recuperating in the NICU, he got to go home with his family. Today, Charlie is going on three. He’s beautiful and healthy and “runs around with no limitations,” says Patty.

Despite the support of family, friends and their faith community at Holy Family Church in Syracuse, the pregnancy and Charlie’s first months were understandably difficult on the young parents. Though they did connect with other families coping with CDH online, there was no one in their lives who had faced the same struggle.

“No one understood, no one knew exactly what we were going through,” Vince said.

He remembered that feeling vividly when he saw a flyer recruiting for Elizabeth Ministry volunteers at Holy Family this summer. He called Patty and the two signed up.

This new initiative, officially launched on Mother’s Day, is part of an international organization that focuses on “the dignity of human life and strengthening relationships in order to build up the family and create vibrant communities.” Elizabeth Ministers are volunteers who are willing to offer their experiences and support to peers who need “encouragement, hope and healing on issues related to childbearing, sexuality and relationships.”

Lisa Hall, director of the Respect Life Office of the Syracuse Diocese, says she became aware of the need for this type of support a few years ago at a meeting for the Commission of Women in Church and Society and more recently following a seminar on the challenges faced by women and families with adverse prenatal diagnoses.

There can be pressure from medical professionals, she said, for women to terminate their pregnancies in light of such diagnoses.  Experts have estimated that around 90% of women who receive a prenatal diagnosis of Down syndrome in their babies end up terminating the pregnancy.

It can also be difficult for parents to ensure their babies receive aggressive or even ordinary means of care when facing an especially grave or terminal diagnosis.

Lisa Lickona found herself in that situation last November with her eighth child, Genevieve. Born premature at 24 weeks and weighing just over one pound, Genevieve had serious defects of the heart and intestine. She was also later diagnosed with Down syndrome. Given her size and medical complications, the odds of survival were not in her favor. But Genevieve was a fighter and in her first days and weeks, she gained weight and made progress.

Several weeks after her birth, though, Genevieve’s doctors believed she had developed an infection that required intravenous antibiotics, and delivering that medicine would require a surgical procedure. Lickona said she was pressured by doctors not to pursue the surgery since, given Genevieve’s many medical challenges, they felt her chances for long-term survival regardless of the surgery were slim. Lickona, who holds two degrees in theology, refused to have her daughter treated differently than any other patient.

“I told them, ethically, morally, you have to do it,” she said. “You’re treating a real person, not a collection of possibilities.” Ultimately, Genevieve had the surgery.

Sadly, two weeks later Genevieve passed away. Though she was only with them for three months, the Lickonas say Genevieve remains a huge part of their family.

“Genevieve’s life was a perfect witness of why God gives us a little baby like this,” Lickona said. “Every person is a gift. Genevieve drew things out of us that we never thought we could do.”

Lickona’s strong faith and family got her through those three months, as did the help of her friends from the mothers rosary group at St. Mary’s Church in Cortland and and other friends. She said meals arrived on the porch every night. One night near the holidays, even a Christmas tree appeared. But not every woman and family has this kind of network to support them.

“We realized we needed a way to provide support and resources [that allow women and their families] to stay true to Catholic teaching,” Hall said. She also emphasized that Elizabeth Ministry services aren’t just for those facing a difficult pregnancy, but for all women and families working through infertility, miscarriages, the adoption process, the stresses of typical pregnancy and family life—everything.

“It’s about creating and building a culture of life  and supporting families and parents,” she said. “Affirming that each life has infinite value and that there is hope, even in the most challenging circumstances.”

The diocese’s first Elizabeth Ministry is being piloted at the parish level at Holy Family. This ministry is a natural extension of work already being done there by Joan Nolan, the diocese’s expert on natural family planning, and her team.

Rita Condon, Elizabeth Ministry coordinator, oversees the initiative’s activities. Her primary focus is getting women and families to step forward — both those who need help and those who want to give it.

“There is not the same camaraderie among women as there used to be,” she said, recalling the days when mothers would connect over clotheslines in their yards. “We want to provide an opportunity to gather women in and inform them about fertility, life, relationships and give them real options and support.”

Condon stressed that Elizabeth Ministers are not trained counselors or doctors. Rather, they’re peers who have faced challenges and now want to help others through theirs. Nor is the ministry rigid or time-consuming; there are no meetings, just “get togethers.” They focus on “the little things you can do,” Condon said, “making a pot of sauce for a new mom, making a phone call to a mom who needs an ear.” The group also makes gift baskets for new or expectant mothers.

So far, there are 12 ministers who range in age from 25 to 83 and who bring vast experience and wisdom on family life. Patty and Vince are among the first crop, and the couple has already made dinner for a large family who recently welcomed another baby. They’re looking forward to connecting with other new parents and those who may be facing a tough pregnancy.

“We know what it was like,” Vince said. “We feel like we’re a good fit to get involved and give back. Elizabeth Ministry matches you up with people who have had similar experiences to let them know that there is hope and that God is there with you.”

Condon, Nolan, and Hall have high hopes for the ministry and would like to see other parishes begin their own chapters. Most important, they want mothers and families to know that their parish families are there to help them.

“Just like your biological family,” Nolan said, “we — your holy family — will be your support.”

For more information on Elizabeth Ministry in the diocese, contact Rita Condon at (315) 673-9458 or This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it ; Joan Nolan at (315) 488-3139 or This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it ; or Lisa Hall at (315) 470-1418 or This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .