Experiments in Catholicism
By Emily E Long
It was a cold fall morning when I made my First Reconciliation. Although we had been preparing for weeks in Religious Ed class, I was still nervous. When we were called to line up outside the confessional, I tepidly joined my other classmates. A minute later, sensing my anxiety, my mom came to join me in line, trying to distract me and assure me that it would be okay. When it was my turn, instead of walking into the confessional, I tensed up. My mom gave me a pat on the shoulder signaling that it was time to go in, but I didn’t move. She then pushed a little harder, but I dug the heels of my maryjane’s into the maroon carpet outside the confessional. Eventually, I went in, confessed my sins, was forgiven, and did my penance. Everything was okay, but I was not looking forward to going back anytime soon.
Flash forward 20 years, and I don’t dig my heels into the ground about confession. I actually try to go at least once a month. So how did I get here? I came to the understanding that confession is a way where the Lord directly demonstrates how much He loves us. Now, when we are young, we learn that Jesus loves us. As we grow older, we try to wrap our heads around that fact. Two meaningful devotions center around His love for us – The Divine Mercy and The Sacred Heart of Jesus. To share this message with the world, the Lord used two seemingly ordinary religious sisters as His messengers – St. Margaret Mary Aloque and St. Faustina.
St. Margaret Mary Aloque was a French nun in the 17th century. After being a nun for three years, Christ appeared to her and requested that she make His love for humankind evident through her. The Lord said that although His human heart knew all of the sufferings of man, it overflowed with His love for us. The devotion to the Sacred Heart focuses on the fact that even though Jesus understood all the sin and depravity of this world, His heart has nothing but love for us.
Nearly 300 years later, the Lord would again use an anonymous nun to deliver a message to the world. Saint Maria Faustina Kowalska received visions of Jesus, who asked her to become, first, his apostle, then, his “Secretary of Mercy.” The message of Divine Mercy tells us that God loves us and loves all that we are. His mercy is greater than our sins, and when we place our trust in Him, His mercy flows through us to others.
On confession, the Lord told St. Faustina, “When you go to confession, to this fountain of mercy, the Blood and Water which came forth from My Heart always flows down upon your soul.” He said confession was a “tribunal of mercy.” Unlike trials where you beg for relief from a punishment, He is waiting to extravagantly shower you in His love and forgiveness.
At my first confession, I hadn’t done anything horrible; I was only 7 years old, but I was still afraid of facing my sin. I wasn’t taught about Divine Mercy or the Sacred Heart of Jesus. As I grew older and learned about these concepts, I became more comfortable with going to confession. This isn’t to say that I don’t sometimes dig my heels in. I often find myself questioning if I really need to go as I sit in Holy Hour. Then I reframe my thoughts to just how good the Lord is and how He wants to cover us in His mercy and love. I know that through His love, confession isn’t getting a slap on the wrist, it is being willing to reach out, take Jesus’ hand, and receive forgiveness.
Experiment of the Week: On March 30, from 4 to 7 p.m., all churches in the diocese will be open with priests ready to hear your confession. If you are on the fence about it or haven’t been to confession in a while, why don’t you try it again? Consider how much the Lord loves us and try to reframe confession from digging your feet in about sin, to walking freely in the love of the Lord.
