Seeking knowledge, comfort, and grace

Office of Adult and Ministerial Formation to hold fall workshop: “Ministering to the Dying”

It’s not something we like to think about or talk about often, but the reality is that we will all eventually pass away. Although, as Catholics, we look forward to everlasting life with Jesus after our death, experiencing the final days of a family member, friend, or loved one is still an incredibly difficult time for everyone involved.

“There’s a mathematical and biological reality that we are all going to pass — we’re all going to go home to God someday, by the grace of God — and people we know, people we love, people we’re close to, may get there before we do. So the question is, [what are] the outcomes of this?” said Deacon Jeff Dixe, director of the Offices of Adult and Ministerial Formation for the Diocese of Syracuse. “A lot of people are going to be journeying with a loved one, or a friend, through their final days. How do we do this in such a way that brings knowledge, comfort, and grace to the situation, for everyone involved, and most importantly for that person who is in their final days?”

To help answer these questions (and more), the Offices of Adult and Ministerial Formation are offering a Formation for Ministry Fall workshop called, “Ministering to the Dying: Presence, Prayer, and Practicalities in the Final Stages of Life,” that will be held on Saturday, September 20, at Holy Cross Church in DeWitt. The interactive workshop is open to all and will feature presentations from two speakers, time for attendees to talk about and process their own stories, and opportunities for Q&A.

The two presenters are Father Charles Vavonese and Reverend Jana Biesanz. Fr. Vavonese has been a Catholic priest for over 50 years and created Project Compassion, a comprehensive training series that focuses on how to find peace, comfort, and acceptance at the end of life. Rev. Jana is the director of Mission and Outreach for Francis House and brings over 17 years of contemplative training and practice to the spiritual care, grief support, and end-of-life education she offers. Dc. Dixe explained how both of the speakers bring with them rich, varied experiences related to end-of-life care, which complement each other well and can provide attendees with well-rounded insights.

It’s important to have “the diversity of background, experience, and things of that nature, and with the outcome of both speakers coming back to that same place,” he said. “Father Vavonese and Reverend Jana have two different sets of experiences. They have many shared experiences, but yet they’re their own people, and they’ve had their own training and come from their own background, but they meet at the same place … there’s that complementariness of experiences that we really want to bring to the forefront for people.”

Dc. Dixe shared that the workshop will focus on three questions: “What’s the knowledge that I need when it comes to end-of-life experiences? How do I build the comfort, not only for myself, but the comfort that I can extend to that person? And how do I tap into the grace that’s necessary to make sure that God is the center of this experience for the person who we’re ministering to, and for us, as those accompanying them?”

He said he came to understand the importance of contemplating these questions when he accompanied his own father during his final days. While not sugarcoating the difficulty of such situations and emphasizing the need to process the normal human reactions of fear, grief, and devastation, he also highlighted that preparing for and anticipating these difficult times is so important.

“It goes back to a premise that I’ve long held, that I would rather learn how to respond to a situation efficiently than react to it in a panic. And that’s really what we want people to be able to do,” Dc. Dixe said.

For Catholics especially, end-of-life care is so important because “life doesn’t end, it changes,” Deacon said. “We are going to have to process human grief, yes… [There’s] absolutely no denying it. But if we are true believers in the message of the salvation of Jesus Christ, we know that there’s something greater waiting for us, and that’s the glory of heaven with Jesus forever. So that’s where the rubber meets the road when it comes to issues like this, you know? Do we really believe?”

As workshop attendees will explore and discuss, and as Dc. Dixe explained, it all comes down to learning how to find the grace in these difficult situations.

“We have to find that place to let the Lord in and to guide us and guide the person we’re ministering to in that final part of the journey … As St. Paul says, ‘Grace abounds all the more’ if we just let that happen.”

“Ministering to the Dying: Presence, Prayer, and Practicalities in the Final Stages of Life” is free of charge, although goodwill offerings are accepted. It will be held from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Saturday, September 20, at Holy Cross Church, 4112 E. Genesee St., DeWitt.

Register at syracusediocese.org/formation-for-ministry. Contact Dc. Jeff Dixe at [email protected] with any questions.