‘Moving from role to soul’
role to soul
A snapshot focus on the transition to retirement
“It’s not so much ‘doing’ anymore. It’s about ‘being.’”
That’s how Father John Rose described elderhood and retirement, a summary of extensive reading and research that he began when he turned 70 and asked himself, “What is this aging thing about?”
The Sun recently spoke to three retired diocesan priests about their personal journeys so far: Father Rose, of Syracuse, who retired in 2019; Father Jon Werner, of Binghamton, who retired in 2023; and Father Lester Smith, of Syracuse, who retired in 2017. Each still offers their gifts of time, experience and love for our Lord to fill in at Masses, weddings, funerals and other occasions, but each also has a new freedom to explore and develop their inner being.
“Sometimes aging gets a bad rap, you know, that is considered, like, over the hill, useless, no purpose at all,” said Father Rose, 78. “No. It’s a whole new area in our lives toward elderhood, and [an elder] is a person of wisdom, harvesting all of their life experiences.
“It’s not so much ‘doing’ anymore. It’s about ‘being.’ How do I be — especially from a Gospel perspective — how do I be compassionate? How do I be merciful? How do I be a person of justice and non-violence, both to myself, to others, to our world?”
Father provides workshops in both Syracuse and Rochester about the spirituality of aging and said there’s a hunger to learn more about what it involves. He explained further that aging, which is tied to retirement, is not so much about being productive, but being fruitful; not so much about being competitive, but compassionate and moving from our role to our soul.
“Who am I when I’m not the editor of The Catholic Sun or a priest or a teacher or a plumber or a retailer? Who am I as John Rose without my roles? … Who does God see me as? It’s a time of inner development, inner vision. I become who God is calling to me to become.”
Father Rose fills his schedule as an active volunteer for two local non-profit organizations, InterFaith Works of CNY and Emmaus Ministry. A spiritual director for many years, he also trains others to become spiritual directors at the Spiritual Renewal Center in Syracuse. Currently 27 spiritual directors help guide more than 250 people per month. “It’s such an intimate, personal experience [of] people dealing with transitions,” especially for those who are older. “We’re an aging population … and so [there’s] a lot of retirement going on. That’s a transition for people. How do I move from a very active, structured kind of life in the workforce area to now, where I have a lot more time that’s unstructured? So, we look at where God is in that, what God might be inviting them to … It’s a new chapter.”
Father Rose felt called to retire six years ago. “I felt so busy, busy, busy all the time and it was a movement (in my heart) to spend more time with myself, with relationships, with God, with my family, with my friends. I was trying to fit those in before, but now I have more time for that.”
Father Werner, who is just a little over one year retired, finds himself reading more, socializing more and playing racquetball two or three times a week. He also traveled to the Philippines last year on a diving excursion with his brother and a diving group. “You know, I don’t dive as much as I used to, and it’s a little more intimidating and it’s a long trip, but it’s the biodiversity capital of the world, so it’s extraordinary,” he said, adding that he may be making a trip to Kenya soon, too. “Diocesan priests don’t have required experiences in foreign countries, different cultures, [with] different languages,” he said. “I think it’s good [to visit] places where you experience a different life and different world.”
Father Smith said when he first retired, he took a four-month road trip across the country to visit relatives and friends. He still travels from time to time but mostly enjoys the simple pleasures of visiting with friends over dinner and watching movies once in a while. He also said he can pray better now. When it comes to hobbies? “I don’t really have any,” he admitted. “I’m a dull person, really, but I’m happy.” He laughed.
The Vietnam veteran, who initially struggled with the idea of becoming a clergyman, but who desired to preach the Gospel, said he’s the happiest now than he’s ever been as a priest. “I appreciate our Catholic faith more than ever. It’s truly the pearl of great price. It corresponds to the true nature of being human.”
Not only is he happiest now, but he also said he’s busier than he’s ever been — half-joking that he accomplishes just 20% of what he used to. “When you get old, everything takes longer!” he said.
Father Rose recalled a conversation years ago when he was first ordained in 1972. He asked a retiring priest why he would ever want to retire. “And then as I got older, I went, ‘Oh, now I know why,’ because your energy is less. There’s a different energy level that moves you [in] a different direction — and I think that’s intentional.”
